الأربعاء، سبتمبر 06، 2006

Its all about passion my dear.

When the question was repeated twice a day, by A.G. and Classical feelings, I found myself un-expectedly, running through the blog reading 2 years back to back with all the laughter and the screams, hatred and love. It’s all engraved between the lines. It might sound ridiculous, but the feeling I felt was un-describable. Kept me wondering in some way or another. Hmm, at some moment in time I used to love this place and cherish it to the utmost. At some moment in time I couldn’t wait to write down the whole story.
Then the passion was gone!

Like how I lose interest in anything, then regret.
I regret a lot.. I don’t believe so. Well, no.. I do not know in fact. I do not remember my deepest regrets or my worst days. The worst and the best are always yet to come. Its life, full with its miseries, wonders, puzzles and riddles. Yet its always the one thing you never expected, the 1st to come!
Strange enough to be true, I add.

Yesterday I ran quickly between few posts in another fellow blogger’s blog, as well. And the feeling I got from out there might not be written in words! I mean, I was amazed myself to the extent I ran through my posts again.
If I were you reading these words, I might think this gal the most sensitive creature earth had known, exactly like how I felt while reading him. But neither of us is not!
Here is where the other life lives. Here is where the heart and mind dive into another world not ours in the sense of “you and me” right now and right here!

Blubbers again, and again, and again. You know something, while I was reading and trying to remember things all together, I didn’t remember some posts “why was I writing this or that?” I forgot even to whom addressed, forgot the timing, forgot the meaning. Just like a flower lost everything of its own but the smell. That’s how memory remains. But what if, imagine what if, memory is no longer a mixture of different smells? What if you got something vivid to read?
“got me?!”

I wrote yesterday a lengthy post, then deleted and didn’t publish, until I passed by the Nile again today. Something connects blogging with the Nile in my mind. My eyes went wet as my usual for watching this sense, then I remembered yesterday’s feeling when I read both blogs, mine and the other fellow blogger. Its like both passion exists. My passion for the ashes of my memories, and the passion you have for what I write, no matter who you are, a friend a passer by.. a reader.. or just someone looking down at us from high up above. I can understand now why some were asking me over and over again not to stop this and keep it going. Your passion visited me yesterday night when I read the whole thing. Then I remembered every song I chosen and what for. I remembered every picture I picked for a post and the journey I traveled with.

Its like collecting pieces of me somewhere and through it to the wild space. Just like I said in my 1st post “Dear whoever.. May I finally know you?”

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