...

Mins ago I was posting one long entry about how sad I am now. Sad?
Yes..
It was like I am on the edge of breaking again..
Yeah.. so frustrating when you feel your feeling for a certain person became a burden on you.. especially when you hate and can’t get over..
When you talk, and words hurt
When your tears stand like stones in your eyes
You live mins in dreams.. then the rest of the day in the same boring ritual claiming its your best
While it’s the worst nightmare you’ve ever learnt..

Yeah.. every day I know defiantly “life sucks”.. when you feel you are in the wrong place.. wrong time and wrong people
You wish to have some feather and collect your wing.. fly away some where .. or may be leave yourself with the wind till you find a nest somewhere and call home.. or you are finally dead..

Had you ever wished so hard to leave life?

Its not a matter of frustration as much as a wisdom I might have learnt the hard way out…
It such a pain hating someone you should appreciate while in fact, you can’t have anything but black feelings to him…

Wish I’d have the courage once and tell him in the face how hard I truly do….
And watch him dwelling in it..
May be then –no matter how hard it might sound- may be then, he’d understand the ages of dark visions built in the minds and hearts guarded by his fake yellow smile..