الخميس، ديسمبر 27، 2007

Today’s Graduation..

I used to listen to this phrase “what lasts in one’s mind, only the tiny fragile moments. Only the faint perfume of unreality, remains.”.. and believe in it.
Now, I wonder if I do.

Memories have to have something concrete to make me happy. Something I can hold in hands life long and remember. I’m not good in recalling the past. I forget. And there… I always wish to have a box, and pick parts of time. Think of it as a flower you’d pick and put in a book. Then put it back in the box and close safe..
Not a video.. not a photo.. nothing.. only part of time.. you get it out and you live the feeling all over again.

It’s hard. It might be impossible.. but that’s my wish for tonight.. not because I wish to live all over again the day today.. no.. today was like doing a ritual that lost its meaning way long when you forgot when the time to do it right. So I didn’t deeply feel it..
But I wish to live it all over again.. and do what I wished to do, yet wasn’t done..

I feel provoked for the camera that didn’t take a single shot. And I feel provoked for the moments I wish to have.. and alas.

I returned back home with my graduation certificate in my hands, and jingles in my hind of a graduation ceremony I’ve just lived.. but yet.. I don’t feel anything.. may be the severe killing headache I’m having right at the moment. Or may be for postponing the day that long.. or may be.. just a may be.. it didn’t go the way I wished for yesterday… and few days back..

Dear colleagues, you will be all missed.. college life itself will be missed.. memories will be forgotten.. pictures torn.. but one thing is certain.. and I’m sure of.. one thing will always stay with me.. life long.. and thats my special secret of tonight.

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