Traps of mind

A musical CD. Just a normal musical CD I have. If you looked close, you might ask yourself million times, what makes her treasure it this way?.. and I certainly do.
I keep playing that one, that specific one over and over again, non stop. I totally love how I adore it.. The passion shivers me with every time I pass by piece number 16 is indescribable. Starts with thunder, piano then violins.. and tickles of falling rain drops.. all sort of gloominess in the universe.. then a sudden up rise in melody.. slows down.. slows down more… piano interferes… scratched by the virginity of young children playing in the background.. water moving.. then piano and violin and children laughing once more..
Hope? Does it sound like hope to you? Mm.. for me it doesn’t.. or may be it does.. I don’t know.. love it.. and can keep on listening till forever.. and what else would I need in life?!
Yeah.. you tell me.. what do I need?

Me? Old beggar for a sip of inner warmth and trust that I can bare it though.. life is like circles.. parabolic curves in other words.. you start at a point.. walk around for some time, then return back. You’d always return back to the same point. No one stays where s/he is.. and yet no one changes too.. amazing truth I’ve discovered today by the way. A novel and film. The film showed a feeling less person who changed into a lovable character, who changed his materialistic life in live in a farm.. which to me sound like utter fiction. And the other novel talking about someone discovered the reality about life that no body, no body what so ever changes. And that’s a fiction to me too.

Stupid life is.. or as wicked as it can be.. playing games, lots of games.. watching us and laughing.. I can hear the voice already..
So dear that I wish to spit on it right now.
If it’s a desert.. why would it pour not rain? Why would it cause such a misery for someone who never asked for anything. Not misery, but a miserable confusingly misery. And yet it pours, and yet it pours again..

God help me out!
If the curve reached a peak once.. why would it ever go down with such heavy burden on shoulders and crack in the heart?
A word can kill.. and can be the very same that sentences lands to revival..